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sometimes i really hate myself that i'm not a good friend. i hate myself. i wasn't thinking. i need to wake up. i can't see the picture clearly and tt's wat i hate the most. the whole world seemed like a swirl to me. everytime. i dun want to be sad again but i make myself sad again.

then, my other self speaks again. wondering wat will happen if i have said what i should have said and everything might be fine.

but if i haven't say anything everything will go on normal which seems to be the case for the past few weeks and not to get so bothered by it. maybe i was thinking and knew watever i was going to do is a waste. until i broke it.

maybe i'd been right maybe i'd been wrong. even if i'm right, i'd often tot tt i'm at the wrong. i tot everything is my fault so i'm at the wrong. nothing is right anyway. for this situation i think i handled it wrongly. i may be right, may be wrong. i dunno. i just simply feel like shit.